Your child finally graduated college and you’re ready to celebrate and turn them loose. Not so fast! This parenting stuff is a life-long job. It’s not over and probably never will be. They still need all the help you can give them. I’m not talking about financial help. I’m talking about help with basic life skills. My kids have told me that college was great for learning job skills, but totally inadequate for basic things they need to know for functioning in life as an adult. My husband and I jokingly call ourselves their “life coaches”. We’ve had to coach them over this hurdle from college to independent adulthood. They don’t learn these things in school, so let’s coach them with these 10 crucial life lessons:
- Laundry – I know this sounds ridiculous but some young adults still don’t know how to do basic laundry. If they didn’t learn this in college, please teach them now, for the sake of their future spouses. They need to know the basics, at least.
- Basic sewing skills – Really, everybody needs to know how to sew on a button or fix a ripped hem. They don’t need to make an entire garment like we did ‘back in the day’ in home ec class, but they will be grateful to know the basics. Even the guys might need to fix something.
- Cooking basics – They might be living on their own before getting married. I know you don’t want them living on fast food, so teach them some super-easy basic dinners they could fix for one person. A basic cookbook would be a great idea for a college graduate, whether male or female. By the way, make sure they know how to do dishes or rinse dishes before putting in dishwasher.
- Finances – Now for some more important areas such as finances. My kids have told me that in both high school and college, they were never taught how to use a checkbook. Yikes! Every kid should be required to take a basic personal finance class in school. If not, then I guess it’s up to us parents. Teach them the basics such as how to manage a checking account, basic budgeting, and how to save.
- Insurance – This is something you learn by doing, and most young adults start out not even understanding how the whole process works. Teach them how it works, the meaning of a deductible, and how to file a claim. This goes for health insurance and auto insurance.
- How to find a job – This another area that schools aren’t teaching. They teach the job skills and then say “goodbye”. They need to know what type of jobs they can get with their degree, where to look, and how to go through the job search process.
- How to take care of a car – We bought each of our kids a basic auto repair/tool kit for their car and tried to explain how to use it. Unless they took an auto mechanics class in school (probably didn’t), they will only learn this from you, the parent.
- How to take care of an apartment, house, and yard – This is another basic skill you don’t learn in school. They need to know basic house maintenance, basic cleaning, and how to keep up with basic repairs, inside the house, and outside, and the yard.
- How to handle people – Life can be tough for your kids in school, but it doesn’t necessarily get better in adulthood. They need your help with how to handle difficult people in their life, whether its friends or coworkers.
- How to be organized, set goals, and plan for the future – This is something most people just learn as they get older and wiser, but why not give them an advantage by teaching them some ways to set goals and make future plans. If they’re not naturally wired to think about the future, you can help them to set goals in different areas of their life and how to make plans for their future.
There is an endless list of things we need to help our kids with before they go out into the world, and maybe you’ve already taught them. That’s great! But some young adults have a lot to learn and need our coaching, and this is something we’ll probably be doing for a lifetime. But that’s ok. I love it that our kids still need us, even if it’s just to talk things out or give advice. So, don’t think you’re done parenting. You’re just moving on to the next stage: the young adult’s life coach. Life is a learning process. Help them make the most of it!